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OrientedDis.. Disoriented. |
Friday, March 08, 2002 reflecting back on that post heh, I guess I leave to California on Sunday, actually. My sister is being a real bitch tonight.. to put it mildly. About the beginning/ending of that last post.. well, no, rewording. I was just looking over a conversation I had with someone online a while ago that I saved (yep I save the *few* conversations with people which seem unforgettable but would probably be forgotten anyway should I not save them).. but it's good that I have saved these things, because now I can look back on things, and look at how things are now, and actually understand some things a little better. sorry for the vagueness - 'things' - but I really don't want to get into it all. Really, it's just a 'funny feeling inside'. ::laughs slightly:: Reminds me of Moulin Rouge.. 'kind of funny, this feeling I have inside'.. hehe, but on a more serious note.. yeah, that's exactly how it is.. but looking back on a conversation, I'm realizing where it has come from. It's kind of sad at the same time. How can I have this funny feeling, and still feel like nothing can be helped about it.. and I can't understand it at all.. I've often wondered where it came from though.. how it got started.. but I'm realizing a little bit of that now. *sigh* well anyway. I'm out for now. I just really shouldn't think about it anymore, and not be a part of any conversation that might provoke any further feelings.. that's kind of the only conclusion I can draw from any of this. detachment. that's so like me. ugh, and yet I say I'm working to keep from doing that... bleeeh.. no more. . . . babbled Lin |
