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OrientedDis.. Disoriented. |
Saturday, February 02, 2002 Tonight was seriously one of the best nights ever. Today I didn't go to school because I had a "job shadow" to do.. heh, at a place where I had to actually sign letters of confidentiality... lots of 'top secret' stuff that I got to see (not joking), however tha place had nothing to do with the government.. darrrrn. ;) but I really saw a lot of interesting stuff.. something like that of a huge science laboratory (I got to go in one area - a 'clean room' - where I had to get dressed in a 'clean suit' which literally covered every inch of my body) .. the person I was 'job shadowing' was kind of weird (spooky-type guy), hehe, and everywhere we went to talk with other people in the place, the people would say to me "sorry you got stuck with him".. uuuh. ::laughs slightly:: so I guess he wasn't the most pop-u-lar guy working at the place. The other people I met were really funny/neat, hee.. and dang there were some *hot* guys working at the place who I met.. *grin* ... the term *hot* used sparingly, but in this case.. they were (very smart + pretty good looking).. .. I think I might have met my future husband. hehe.. I just saw this one certain guy and was instantly attracted, and I can't describe it, but.. this might sound stupid/too-self-confident, heh, but I felt like we both had the same feeling.. I just feel like I can sometimes sense a two-way attraction between myself and someone else at first sight just by the way we both first look in each other's eyes (not deeply or anything, just a look) .... hehe, and I really don't think it's something I just make-up out of no where like wishful dreaming, because it really hardly ever happens with me. I usually analyze people pretty well before I jump to any 'attraction' state.. I mean, I can look at a guy and think he looks good, but I feel like I put up barriers immediately after that (or label him as a 'type' - unfortunately) until I actually know him.. so iow any attraction/feelings for someone are completely put aside until I know them - it is possible to do ;D .. heh, but this one guy was different. I wouldn't say he was even the most fabulous looking guy.. there was just something about him that made me want to keep looking at him (usu. I glance at a guy, and if he looks good or whoever he is.. I can usually just ignore it and move on w/ life..) .. and I felt like I was meant to just sit there all day with him to talk and get to know him.. ugh.. lol, I mean, obviously this guy meant something.. it's.. *1* in the morning and I'm thinking about him. strange. ..heh, yeah I'll never see him again.. why would I?.. I couldn't ever even get inside the building again if I wanted. When we were talking I discovered he had just recently graduated from college.. lol, so yeeeaaaaah.. just a *little* older, but he looked very young still.. kind of innocent.. kinda nerdy.. kinda shy.. ...but who knows.. I talked with him for, what, only 5-6 min.? anyway.. moving right along with life. dang, I've talked too much already and nothing about how my *night* was! Ugh. Oh well. I'll just hurry it up. My friend invited my to a major basketball game tonight and sooo.. I just decided to go out and do something. .. I didn't really get to visit w/ any of my friends at the game though because the friend who took me decided to sit in a boring place, and she wouldn't move to where all our friends were, and I wasn't about to just ditch her and go where all of my other friends were.. so we just sat lonely at the game. Our team won the game against our biggest rivals. :) It was a great game too. Then, after the game, I saw all of my friends and we just talked and talked.. and talked.. hehe.. we were seriously all hyper-maniacs.. unfortunately the friend I came with was seeming like she was hating every moment of everything.. "what're we doing?".. "when are we going?".. just kind of constant nagging and not enjoying herself socializing. Anyway, I guess it was ok.. I'm like that a lot too, but tonight was an exception. Hee.. so we drove to Wendys.. dang everyone was SO loud.. we must've had.. *counts* at least 14-16 of us girls.. note *girls*.. stupid guys.. where were they all?.. just college guys were around us, and I can't really describe how annoyed they must've been (but they were laughing still?.. and I kept making nervous eye contact with one of the guys because I was worried he was going to go have someone throw us out of the place).. heh.. I mean.. we were seriously destroying the place.. too crazy to explain... but it was a really funny/good time ;) .. and then who walks in right when we're leaving? Two pretty-good guy friends of mine & others of the group (one who asked me out about a week ago).. it was good to see them, and my non-socializing-annoyed friend finally decided to leave to go home, and I still wanted to hang out, so all of my main friends (6 of us?) headed off to Wal Mart and I went with a diff. friend to Wal Mart.. heh, @ Wal Mart 4-5 other guy-friends found us there and we just hung out with everyone again.. it was seriously crazy.. I don't know what the heck I was on because I was seriously crazy too, lol... it was just sooooo much fun. :) .. I haven't laughed so much for a long time, and it was just good to be out and having a great time in the most boring city. Unfortunately the guy who is a friend/asked me out was being kind of closed off.. I wonder what's going on with him?.. he seemed really.. sullen.. or something.. and just avoided talking.. I don't know, maybe he just wasn't in the mood for being silly/stupid like the rest of us were atm.. which is understandable.. you're either in the mood or you aren't.. it usually is hard to force. *shrug* .. but I'm just going to kind of try to stay out of things with him... he's a great friend, and I love him to death as his friend, but I don't think either of us expect any relationship from each other (which is fine), but it still seems hard for me to deal with being around him when he's talking about all these other girls he's interested in (or just finds 'hot') or just hearing about other girls who have approached him. It's good for him, because he deserves to have all of those girls if he wants.. it's just frustrating for me to feel/have felt like I knew a different side of him which wanted something more permanent and not so.. er.. 'flighty'. I guess, now that I'm thinking about it, I'm kind of angry that he asked me out because the tickets I gave him really were meant for that 'special someone' (long story.. if the story about the tickets was never heard.. oooh well).. and he made it seem like I meant something more to him.. but obviously not.. and he could have just asked me to hang out rather than a 'date'. *shrug* maybe I just analyze things too much (I do..), but he does too.. ::laughs slightly:: so I don't know.. for someone who I would think analyzes the option of asking me out and calling it a 'date'.. *shrug* . . . . babbled Lin |
