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OrientedDis.. Disoriented. |
Thursday, August 30, 2001 um. hi. I haven't posted here for a while. no one really would care, however, because they don't pay attention to this blog.. or so-I-assume. Anyway. I'm just sleep deprived right now... and I'm not feeling all-with-it right now. Today was a great day... absolutely fantastic, for the most part, and... oh.. I went to some youth group thing last night. It was something where all the youth groups in my town came together to just.. I don't know, have fellowship. It was really awesome, however, I actually was really getting into it and felt everyone else was just a little-too-mellow for me. Ha, people have noooooo idea how I like to party ( - alcohol.. etc.).. gosh I'm the biggest party girl I know, you just don't find too many people who want to be crazy and have fun and still be "clean".. at least, if they're out there, then I'm not finding them. Anyway.. again. I had a great time with the friends that I did go with. Mr. "*siiiiiigh*" was there.. yeah, name edit.. but, I'm getting over him.. got over him... don't care to ever have any interest in him anymore.. heh, if he can't talk to me... it's too hard to want to get to know him but never have the chance because it's so awkward, or he's just *weird* like that. ::laughs slightly:: anyway. Even just friends, that would be completely cool with me.. heh, but he never talks to me?... and I realize I should make some effort too, but he's got to hate me or something because he absolutely makes no effort at convo. with me. *shrug* oh, and, Mr... Mr. I-can't-describe-him drove me home afterwards... he's cool, but.. a little two-faced... guys suck :) haha.. j/p.. no, I don't really mean that. I don't need a guy relationship-wise I guess, but it WOULD be helpful to know why they seem to have a hard time approaching me or simply telling me what they're thinking.. when I go to other places people ask me "Why don't you have a boyfriend?".. (usually guys that have girlfriends already anyway).. but.. heh... yeah.. I don't know? Well, even if I had the chance, I'd probably turn down the boyfriend offer because... because I do that? I haven't figured out that part of me yet, why I would do that. but if they at least asked, and I did that, then that would be..er.. okay? no it wouldn't. gosh, no wonder they don't ask me out.. heh, they've got me figured out.. what I'll do... gosh that's messed up of me. dang it... oh well. Why is this turning into an all-about-guys journal thing? How reeeeally disgusting of me to turn it into that.... like that's the center of my mindframe? yuck. . . . babbled Lin |
